Author: georginie

Baudrillard, J (1994) Simulacra and Simulation. USA: University of Michigan Press.

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Baudrillard, J (1994) Simulacra and Simulation. USA: University of Michigan Press. 

Baudrillard, J. (2001) Selected Writings. USA: Stanford University Press.   

I found this book quite heavy and at times hard going. But i stuck with it and eventually found that I wanted to keep reading, I wanted to finish it. 

Baudrillard notes the cultural shift of postmodernity, and that in fact differs from previous cultures in history. Simulacrum is this shift in cultural reasoning. Baudrillard goes on to look at what is real and authentic. According to him, what is seen as real, isn’t actually real as it has actually disappeared, being replaced by something that appears real again, “never again will the real have the chance to produce itself” (Baudrillard (1994) pp. 2). What we see is hyper-reality, which stops us from seeing the differences between what is real and what is not. Therefore, when looking at society, we can understand it as layers, each a representation of something, which has in turned diminished reality. What we see is a sort of copy of reality. But he believes there is no real layer, no absolute original reality, “it is dangerous to unmask images, sine they dissimulate the fact that there is noting behind them” (Baudrillard (2001) pp. 172). Problems can arise form our preconceptions. We have ideas of something and this can also cloud reality. Another problem is that people tend to prefer the layers, not the true reality. People pick and choose their reality, they attached themselves to ideals and ideas, which become their reality, but it has actually distanced them from reality. When we search for what is real we find “When a system has absorbed everything, when one has added everything up, when nothings remains, the entire sum turns to the remainder and becomes the remainder” (Baudrillard (1994) pp. 144). He believes this is a sign of a postmodern society. To Baudrillard, the world is a simulacrum. “Today, it is the real that has become the alibi of the model, in a world controlled by the principle of simulation. And paradoxically, it is the real that has become our true utopia – but a utopia that is no longer in the realm of the possible, that can only be dreamt of as one would dream of a lost object” (Baudrillard (1994) pp.123).

I will be honest I didn’t understand a lot of this book. I found it very heavy going. Some of it was easier to understand than other parts. It did prove an interesting, albeit confusing read.

(Baudrillard, 1994; Baudrillard, 2001; Stewart, G).  

Turner, V & E. Turner (1995) Image and Pilgrimage in Christian Culture. New York: Columbia University Press.

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Turner, V & E. Turner (1995) Image and Pilgrimage in Christian Culture. New York: Columbia University Press. 

In this book, the authors look at Christian pilgrimages. They did initially talk about pilgrimage in various religions, but ultimately concentrated on Christianity. They also look into the symbols, ideals and images. Pilgrimages are an important part of religion, which in turn have important social and cultural characteristics. But it isn’t researched often. This book explores Mexican, archaic, Marian and medieval pilgrimages, whilst concentrating on two main thoughts. The first being the historic raise and explanations behind pilgrimages and the second on the symbols and images of pilgrimages. This book takes an anthropological look at pilgrimages, which I find is a big advantage, as it allows a comprehensive analysis. 

Symbols are important in pilgrimages, they can be seen as ‘eternal objects’, which are never ending. They hold specific points in culture and social structures (Turner (1995) pp. 245-246). Images hold an significance in pilgrimages. They hold value for the followers but also hold an “unrecognized and unlegitimized social values” (Turner (1995) pp. 101). Followers are seen as being “impregnated by unity…and purified from divisiveness and plurality” (Turner (1995) pp. 257). According to the authors, pilgrimages answer the call of spiritual requirements of people. 

I found this book very interesting. It reminded me of my previous studies and helped me remember a lot I had actually forgotten. It was easy to read and easy to understand, but this could have been due to my experience in this field. This book has been valuable and helped with my body of work.

(Turner, 1995; Stewart, G).  

Resources

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Turner, V & E. Turner (1995) Image and Pilgrimage in Christian Culture. New York: Columbia University Press. 

Baudrillard, J (1994) Simulacra and Simulation. USA: University of Michigan Press. 

Warner, M (1976) Alone of All Her Sex: The Myth and the Cult of the Virgin Mary. Oxford: Oxford University Press. 

Butler, J (1990) Gender Trouble. Reprint, UK: Routledge, 2007.  

Mulvey, L (2007) ‘Visual pleasure and narrative cinema’ In: Evans, J and S. Hall (ed.) Visual Culture: A Reader. UK: Sage Publications Ltd, pp. 381-389.  

Nochlin, L (1973) ‘Why have there been no great women artists?’ In: Hess, T. B & E. C. Baker (ed.) Art and Sexual Politics. UK: MacMillan, pp. 1-39.  

UNESCO (2015) A guide for gender equality in teacher education policy and practices. France: UNESCO, pp. 1-112. 

Nabbuye, H (2018) Gender-Sensitive Pedagogy: The bridge to girls’ quality education in Uganda. Washington: Brookings Global, pp. 1-19. 

Ylostalo, H & K. Brunila (2017) ‘Exploring the possibilities of gender equality pedagogy in an era of marketization’, Gender and Education, vol. 30, no. 7, pp. 917-933.  

Pearse, H, A. B. Snider & C. Taylor. ‘The lost Art of Pedagogy’, The Canadian Review of Art Education, vol. 38, pp. 5-16.  

Cencula, M (2020) Pushed, Shoved, and Spit on – What it’s like to be a female photographer at Fashion Ween. At: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/fashion/a30706909/female-photographer-fashion-week/ (Accessed on 4th of February 2020).  

Cowen, T (1996) ‘Why women succeed, and fail, in the arts’ In: Journal of Cultural Economics (vol. 20) pp. 93-113.

LSE. Confronting Gender Inequality. London: Gender Institute. 

Johnson, M (2012) ‘Landscape Studies: The future of the field’ In: Kluiving, S. J and E. B. Guttmann-Bond (ed.) Landscape Archaeology between Art and Science. Amsterdam: Amsterdam University Press, pp. 515-525.  

Schauman, S (2001) ‘Gender/Ethnicity/Landscape’. In: Women’s Studies Quarterly. pp. 261-274.  

Ziegler, M (2011) Institutions, Inequality and Development. Peter Lang AG. pp. 33-51.  

Foster, D. W (2003) ‘Defying the masculinist gaze” Gabriela Liffschitz’s “Recurio’s Humanos”’ In: Chasqui (32, 1) pp. 10-24.  

Lindermann, D. J, C. A. Rush and S. J. Tepper (2014) ‘An Asymmetrical Portrait: Exploring Gendered Income Inequality in the Arts’ In: The Southern Sociological Society (vol. 3, no. 4) pp. 332-348.

Jeanpierre, L (2012) ‘On the Origin of Inequality in the Arts’ In: Revve franchise de sociologie (vol. 53, no. 1) pp. 88-106. 

Stamps, G. Painting the Picture: Gender Inequality in the Global Art Market. At: https://cultursmag.com/painting-the-picture-gender-inequality-in-the-global-art-market/ (Accessed on 23rd of August 2019).  

Steedman, M (2017) Representation of Female Artists in Britain in 2017. At: https://www.freelandsfoundations.co.uk/documents/Representation-of-female-artists-research-2018.pdf (accessed on 11th of September 2019). 

Landscape. Women in Landscape Photography. At: https://landscapephotographymagazine.com/2018/women-in-landscape-photography/ (Accessed on 23rd of August 2019). 

Dautlich, A (2017) Women in landscape photography. At: https://www.aprildautlich.com/blog/2017/9/19/women-in-landscape-photography-its-not-1950-anymore-people (Accessed on 23rd of August 2019).  

Sebag-Montefiore, C (2019) Women battling sexism in photography – a picture essay. At: https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2019/mar/07/women-battling-sexism-in-photography-a-picutre-essay/ (Accessed on 28th of August 2019).  

The Economist (2019) Why women’s art sells at a discount. At: https://www.economist.com/books-and-arts/2019/05/16/why-womens-art-sells-at-a-discount/ (Accessed on 3rd of September 2019).  

Brown, T. W (2019) Why is work by Female Artists still valued less than work by male artists? At: https://www.artsy.net/article/artsy-editorial-work-female-artists-valued-work-male-artists/ (Accessed on 27th of August 2019).  

Diggit (2019) Why are female artists underrepresented? At: https://www.digitmagazine.com/articles/underrepresentation-female-artists (Accessed on 1st of September 2019).

Kinea. Where are all women artists? An analysis of gender inequality in the realm of the arts. At: http://kinea.media/en/human-sciences/women-artists-men-inequalities (Accessed on 30th of August 2019).  

Galley, M (2018) Where are all the great women artists? At: https://artshaus.co.uk/inspirations/women-artists-gender-inequality-in-the-art-world (Accessed on 29th of August 2019).

Greenberg, J (2018) The Female Lens. At: https://alreadymade.org/the-female-lens/ (Accessed on 1st of September 2019).  

Millington, R. Tate Campaign #5 Women Artists to Challenge gender inequality in art. At: htps://ruthmillington.com/tate-5womenartists-gender-inequality-in-art/ (Accessed on 1st of September 2019).  

Vedantam, S (2018) Researchers explore ender disparities in the art world. At: https://www.npr.org/2018/09/18/649060336/researchers-explore-gender-disparities-in-art-world?=1568298097357 (Accessed on 3rd of September 2019). 

Van Graan, M (2019) Representing and challenging inequality through the arts. At: https://en.unesco.org/inclusivepolicylab/analytics/representing-and-challenging-inequality-through-arts/ (Accessed on 4th of September 2019).  

Roller, E. J (2018) My Parents give me $28,000 a year. At: https://www.vox.com/first-person/2018/11/12/18057130/money-income-inequality-basic-income-generational-wealth (Accessed on 6th of September 2019).  

Hernandez, C (2018) LoMo In-Depth: Women Photographer’s on Gender Inequality. At: https://www.lomogallery.com/magazine/336380-lomo-in-depth-women-photographers-on-gender-inequality (Accessed on 8th of September 2019).  

Cooke, A (2017) Is photography overrun by white males? At: https://fstoppers.com/originals/photography-overrun-white-males-160839 (Accessed on 1st of September 2019).  

M, K (2015) Gender Inequality in Entertainment. At: https://vocal.media/geeks/gender-inequality-in-entertainment (Accessed on 1st of September 2019).  

Jess Kohl

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Jess Kohl

Jess Kohls series Friends of the Dead, features portraits taken in a cemetery. The portraits feature visitors to the sites. It shows the connection between the living and the dead. Whilst I am not using portraits in my body of work, Kohls work is valuable to me as I can see how she has taken her images in the cemetery. Her images are quite dark, they are also in monochrome. Which, similar to Kikkas, gives him images a peaceful yet haunting feel. 

Bibliography

Kohl, J. Friends of the Dead. At: jesskohl.com/still/friends-of-the-dead/ (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 


Kaupo Kikkas

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Kaupo Kikkas

In his project, La Bella Morte, Kaupo Kikkas explored cemeteries around the world. His images show how various cultures deal with their death, it also shows a social and cultural aspect as we can see how they graves and cemeteries are kept. His images are quite peaceful, he himself stated that he has built his project in a quite area of landscape photography. This is also what I like about his images, the fact that he see them as landscapes, it is just different from what we are use to seeing. “You may view this as a documentation of graveyards, a death cult, or simply landscape photography” (Kikkas). I find his images fascinating as it looks at a part of life which people tend to avoid like the plague, but it is a fact of life, death is inevitable. It is visually interesting to see how various cultures deal with their dead, where they end up, and how it is maintained. Some of his images are quite haunting. They are moving, as these were people and now they have been laid to rest. I get a peaceful feeling from his images, but at the same time quite an isolating one too. The images he has taken vary in landscape, but also the graves vary, some have one, others may dozens. This image (see fig. 1), show one lone grave.

(Fig. 1. Untitled #19)

The cross is nestled among the long wild grass, obviously not a maintained or regularly visited site. The image has a darkness to it. Kikkas has taken the image from ground level, it almost feel we are on the same level as the dead person, it gives the reader a closer connection. The next image (see fig. 2) shows dozens of graves stacked up.

(Fig. 2. Untitled #3)

They are quite colourful and visually and aesthetically beautiful in my opinion. You can see some graves with flowers, others look very old where people probably haven’t visited. The difference is staggering. I like this image as it shows that despite each grave has a name and a date, they are just one of many. It feels to me that everyone ends up on the same level, which is true really, as we all end up dead. Who we are living, doesn’t change that fact. This last image (see fig. 3), shows a startling comparison between the living and the dead.

(Fig. 3. Untitled #13)

In the foreground, we see a very well kept cemetery. Several headstones look new and clean, there are flowers, the paths are maintained and neat. Yet separated by only a fence is some sort of industrial site, where life goes on. I would say the cemetery was probably there first, and the industrial site was built after, could this be seen as a bit disrespectful being right next to a cemetery or not? Or the fact that life continues for those outside the cemetery grounds. I feel his images have influenced my direction, as this is a similar scene I am photographing. It has been helpful, to see how he has approached this subject and how he has maintained the respect. His images are interesting, I do like his low position for figure one, I believe this is quite effective, something I am using in my work. 

Kikkas also created another series which has been of interest. It is called Ansel. Kikkas was inspired by Ansel Adams, his images are quiet similar. They are perfectly composed, and infocus, they are also in monochrome, with an impressive grey tonal range. His images are striking. I may try my images in black and white, I think this might be a good move for my project. Monochrome gives the images a timeless feel, coupled with the church landscape I think my images will become quite haunting an mysterious. 

Bibliography

Kikkas, K. Ansel. At: https://www.kaupokikkas.com/ansel-1 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 

Kikkas, K. La Bella Morte. At: https://www.kaupokikkas.com/la-bella-morte-1 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 

Figures

Fig. 1. Kikkas, K. Untitled #19. [Photograph – Online]. At: https://www.kaupokikkas.com/la-bella-morte-1 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019).  

Fig. 2. Kikkas, K. Untitled #3. [Photograph – Online]. At: https://www.kaupokikkas.com/la-bella-morte-1 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019).  

Fig. 3. Kikkas, K. Untitled #13. [Photograph – Online]. At: https://www.kaupokikkas.com/la-bella-morte-1 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019).  

Nina Berman

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Nina Berman 

Nina Berman has explored the concept of newly constructed churches in America in her series entitled, Megachurches. These particular churches are massive and have a large congregation. In her accompanying text, Berman states that “every two days, a new megachurch emerges in America” (Berman, 2005). This shows the scale and popularity of these churches. Her images were taken in Florida, Ohio, Kentucky, Colorado and Arkansas between 2004 and 2005. A few of her images show a small section of the congregation but the images that stand out to me are the ones that show the buildings. The images that show the building also feature people, but only two. This image of the United States Airforce Chapel in Colorado (see fig. 1) is very eye-catching.

(Fig. 1. United States Airforce Chapel, Colorado (2004-2005))

Berman took the image from just of the side of the church. It shows the straight lines and geometric shaping of the building which rises up to the sky. She has taken the image from a lower point, this gives the building an impressive profile, it fills the sky. The sky is absolutely clear and blue, this teamed with the glass and white building gives the image a very light feel. It looks almost ‘pure’. 

This next image is of the Ave Maria Oratory in Florida (see fig. 2). This particular church cost in the region of $24 million. The grandeur of the building is evident, you can see this is a building of importance. It is placed in the center of a residential area, and as such the tall structure raises high above it all. It looks at home there, the curves of the building seem to follow the survey of the road. The grey walls match the grey skies. The only problem is the Berman have cut the top of the building off in her image, this may be intentional of course. To me it may symbolise how the church is reaching up into the heavens to something we cannot see. 

(Fig. 2. The Ave Maria Oratory (2004-2005))

Berman has given me a chance to see how artists have tackled the challenge of photographing churches. It is a documentary style approach, a bit different form my approach but I feel her images have been of use to me. I like the positioning she has used, she has taken a low angle, which were I would like my images to go. 

Bibliography

Berman, N. (2005). Megachurches. At: www.ninaberman.com/megachurches (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 

Figures

Figure 1. Berman, N. (2004-2005). United States Airforce Chapel, Colorado. [Photography – Online]. At: https://www.thecaprareview.com/?page_id=1417 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 

Figure 2. Berman, N. (2004-2005). The Ave Maria Oratory. [Photography – Online]. At: https://www.thecaprareview.com/?page_id=1417 (Accessed on 10th of September 2019). 

Gaze

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I want to talk about the male gaze in my extended project. I believe that the male gaze will influence the images that male photographers will take. I believe this is because men and women see the world differently. Many things can effect someones gaze, for example any Experience can influence us. But I think gender does also have an effect. To investigate this I will look at Ansel Adam’s work, as he is a well-known landscape photographer. I will compare his images with a female photographer that was around at the same time, Dorothea Lange. My first thought is that Adams approach to his landscapes is quite predatory, his images are harsh and dominating. For the following images, they show a different subject. One thing to note is that Lange’s images were effected by her working for the FSA. But they still choose which images to take.

I have looked at female photographers who were around at the same time as Adams, who also used similar approaches. One is Dorothea Lange. Both artists photographed the Manzanar War Relocation Center during the second world war. The center was a concentration encampment in California, which held over a hundred thousand Japanese Americans. There is a clear different in their approaches and what they are trying to show. Lange’s images show the difficulties the people faced. Her images showed emotion, they showed sadness and sorrow. For example here is one of  her images (see fig. 1), showing the difficult living conditions. Each ‘room’ is separate by a cloth sheet and there are several to a room. There appear to be a lack of seating and anything of comfort. In contrast, here is Adams image (see fig. 2) of the accommodation. It shows two people sharing in comfort. There is a bed, setting, the people look content, one is reading, the other is crafting. This is very different to oppressive feel of Lange’s image (Palumbo, Unknown Author). 

(Fig. 1. Lange. A typical interior scene in one of the barrack apartments at this center. Note the cloth partition which lends a small amount of privacy)
(Fig. 2. Adams. Mr. & Mrs. Dennis Shimizu)

In another image (see fig. 3) Adams shows a young women practising with a baton, she is posing and appears very happy. Yet in Lange’s image (see fig. 4) there is a boy and his grandfather, both looking sad and upset. They are not happy. 

(Fig. 3. Adams. Baton practice. Florence Kuwata)
(Fig. 4. Lange. Manzanar Relocation Center, Manzanar. California. Grandfather and Grandson of Japanese Ancestry at This War Relocation Authority Center)

Adams images show hope and comfort. Almost as if they people who owned the camp had commissioned to images, to make them look better. But Lange’s show the real desperation and sorrow. There is a stark contrast in these images, one from a female perspectives and one from a male perspective. This could be an example of the differences between a male and female gaze. It is not a matter of men representing women in a sexual way, this is not the case here. But it shows the differences in approach and though-process. It is a matter of what they choose to show, their objectives. I think the difference between a male and female gaze is simply how we see things. Because there is a difference. Adams images show the untouched landscape of America. His images are technically precise and perfectly focused. They show how beautiful the area is, when people haven’t been there, his images show emotion. Adams shows the beauty. Whereas many of Lange’s landscapes show have an agenda. They document social and political issues, they weren’t about showing beautiful landscapes (Palumbo, Unknown Author).  

Bibliography

Palumbo, J. (2019). Did Ansel Adams’s Male Gaze Influence His Landscape Photography? Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019).  

Unknown author. Photographic Comparison: Lange and Adams. Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019).  

Stewart, G.

Figures

Fig. 1. Lange, D. “A typical interior scene in one of the barrack apartments at this center. Note the cloth partition which lends a small amount of privacy” [Photograph – Online]. Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019). 

Fig. 2. Adams, A. Mr. & Mrs. Dennis Shimizu. [Photograph – Online]. Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019).  

Fig. 3. Adams, A. Baton practice. Florence Kuwata. [Photograph – Online]. Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019). 

Fig. 4. Lange, D. Manzanar Relocation Center, Manzanar. California. Grandfather and Grandson of Japanese Ancestry at This War Relocation Authority Center. [Photograph – Online]. Available at: http://langeandadamstakingastand.weebly.com/comparison.html# (Accessed on 2nd of September 2019).  

Pilgrimage

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The sites on this pilgrimage hold a deep significance. Pilgrims undertake this to feel closer to their faith, to feel closer to where their faith was established, and to follow the path where saints once walked. This in turn gives the pilgrims spiritual guidance and a chance to enhance their faith. Pope Callixtus legitimised the pilgrimage to St. David’s Cathedral in the 12th century.

The pilgrimage follows ancient routes that links the churches that were the bases for the establishment of Christianity in Wales. The arrival of the first Christian pilgrims can be dated back around 1,500 years ago. These pilgrims arrived by sea from Jerusalem and Rome. They made this journey to achieve spiritual accomplishment. They reached Pembrokeshire, which was a land of Pagans, and they stayed to bring Christianity to this land. We know them as saints today, but men like David, Justinian, Colman, Brynach, Gwyndaf, Telio and Patrick, were all responsible for establishing communities and churches with the goal of establishing and converting the area. These saints are known for their devotion to the dissemination of Christianity. This period of time was known as the age of the saints. These initial journeys marked a route that attracted other holy men and missionaries as pilgrims. They could either arrive by sea or by land and trace the path that established their faith. One of the most recognisable and most influential of the establishers in Wales was Saint David. St. David holds a special place in the history of but also in modern day Wales. He is a symbol of the nation, and holds an identity the people of Wales can relate to. This is important to the history of Wales and to its people. 

This pilgrimage was established by the actions of men. They become saints, and places in Pembrokeshire are still dedicated to them. Their actions still resound across the landscape. The early pilgrims were missionaries and holy men. They follow their forbearers to feel closer to their faith and in turn to be closer to their God. Generations of holy men continued to come on this pilgrimage. This pilgrimage was created by men and become one for men, because it became born of an established tradition. This is similar to how gender inequality has been disseminated from an established thought and traditions. 

Here is a link to the research on Pilgrimages that I have done for my Body of Work:

Pilgrimage

Assignment Five

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Here is a link to my fifth assignment:

Assignment Five

I had my last tutorial with my tutor for this module today. We discussed what changes I had implemented from the last tutorial. My tutor said my writing had improved considerably. The clarity has improved which is good news. The changes in writing are not fully done yet and needs fine tuning. 

I wasn’t sure where to put the abstract, but my tutor said I put it in the right place. My abstract needs work. I need to include the main ideas in my work, like a map of my work. I could possibly include around 10 key words. 

My first chapter needs fine tuning so my arithmetic is clearer. For example, the way I have written implies that history hasn’t changed things. 

In my second chapter I need to include more about the FSA for my argument. What I have already written is historically, I need to take it to the next level. We also discussed my section about Catherine Opie, my tutor suggested possibly cutting it out if I cannot rework it to fit my argument. The images I’ve used do not relate well, I either need to explain it or cut it out. 

My tutor said my work in chapter three on pedagogy is good. In my research I managed to find one of the key academics, Nochlin. My tutor says I have some good sources.  

Overall I need to tweak a few sentences, develop a bit more, and interact with the quotes I have used more consistently. My tutor did say that I have implemented the previous feedback well and if I carry on developing at the same rate, I can submit for the November assessment. 

Here is the Annotated File from my tutor:

Annotated CommentsDownload

Here is my tutor report, filled in by myself and my tutor:

A5 – Feedback FormDownload

Feedback for the last draft

Here is the annotated essay from the final feedback:

Tutor Comments 2Download

Responding to the Feedback

Whilst my work has improved, there are still a few tings to work on. Basically I need to fine tune, but these things need to be done for the work to be suitable for submitting for assignment. I am going to research a bit more into the FSA and include this in my second chapter. 

My tutor said that I needed to improve my work before submitting and offered to view my work again before completion. I will make any changes I need to and then will email it through again. 

Final Draft – Submission Two

From my feedback for this draft I am happy that I’ve implemented the feedback. There are a few minor things that I will be addressing prior to submitting for assessment in March.  

Assignment Four

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Here is a link to my fourth assignment:

Assignment Four

I had my feedback tutorial for assignment four today with my tutor. My tutor stated that my voice is starting is show through in my work but there are areas that are lacking. For example, my methodology is not fully evident in the document. It may be a case of clarifying things, adding a few sentences and explaining my reasoning. One part that needs clarifying is where I say that I will be looking at certain things but not others. Whilst word count is a valid reason, I still have the final say of what is included, I need to explain why I made these decisions. My tutor also said in certain parts, I sound unsure and uncertain, especially when I say ‘I think’. To help this, I need to weave sources with ideas to back them up and create a strong base. I need to establish my ideas with sources, by creating a relationship between them. Some of my writing is too ‘wordy’, so I can cut a bit out here. This is a problem as it obscures the topic. 

In my second chapter, I look at the male gaze. My tutor said that my introduction is good, but the rest is fragmented. The main theorist who looks into the male gaze is Laura Mulvey, yet her work is missing from my research. My comparison of Dorothea Lange and Ansel Adams need amending and re-developing. I need to give the history behind them, for example Dorothea Lange worked for the Farm Security Administration which was a government organisation. This bears relevance to my comparison. I need to make clear that one of the images I used for comparison are portraits, not landscape, so I can explain their relevance. I also need to look again at my comparison of Catherine Opie’s work and her aim. Especially when looking at the technically perspectives. 

In my third chapter, I discuss pedagogy, as this topic was quite new to me, there some are some issues. I need to make it clear that pedagogy is all education. I need to look at the term androgogy, and talk about how it is not an accepted term. I can also bring here how pedagogy can be used to help adults amended their thoughts. 

Here is my annotated document:

A4 – Annotated FileDownload

Here is my feedback report that I filled in with my tutors additional comments:

Feedback ReportDownload

Responding to the Feedback

My feedback session raised a few points where I need to work on and are lacking. I need to explain my reasoning. For example I need to say why I have included what I  have but excluded something else. I realised I haven’t done this and will work on it for my final draft. 

I need to use my sources and weave their arguments and explain how they relate to my own arguments. 

I also need to bring in the work of the main theorists like Laura Mulvey. My research does look at her work but I need to properly integrate her theories into my work as it will be valuable for my work. 

I will take this feedback on board and try to remedy it.