Tag: Assignment Four

Assignment Notes

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Assignment Notes

After feedback from my tutor on my introduction and my first chapter (assignment three), I revisited them to work on the advice.

My introduction is tailored to introduce the topic and provide a very brief account of what I intend to do. 

My first chapter has been amended and looks at the reasoning behind how the inequality spread in the art world and into landscape photography. 

In my second chapter, I look at the male gaze and how I think it has influenced society and our perception of landscape photography. I believe the male gaze plays a part in our perception of the landscape. We are use to seeing images by male photographers, we are effectively seeing the world through a male perspective. I looked at how some female artists are addressing the male gaze, they are contrasting their work against Ansel Adams’ landscapes to highlight their female gaze. I believe this is an important part to look into as it looks at how we see landscape images, the hidden sub-conscious narrative within them and how female artists are using their work to highlight a gendered gaze. 

In my third chapter, I put forward an idea that could be implemented to help fight the inequality effectively. I looked at how galleries can help the immediate problem. I then look into pedagogy and how this could effectively be used to teach the next generation and stop inequality across the board. I believe pedagogy would be a tremendous step in helping gender inequality not just in landscape photography, but it would help the inequality in everyday life. It would be beneficial for the generations to come. 

In my conclusion, I bring everything together and bring my work to a close.  

I have set-out my document with a cover page, which includes my name, student number, title, and word counts with and without quotations. Next I have my contents page, then the introduction, chapter one, chapter two, chapter three, conclusion, references list, figures list and then the bibliography. 

My research has aided in my assignment and has formed the bulk of my research folder. My research has taken many forms, from books and journals, to websites and information pamphlets. 

Here is a link to my research folder page, which includes a full bibliography:

Research Folder

Word Count

The limit for this essay is 5000 words +/- 10%. Before I submitted my first draft, I have 6594 words excluding quotes etc. It was quite a lot over. But I did have leeway and scope to cut it down. I contacted my tutor to ask whether I should cut the word count down before submitting or in light of feedback. She advised to make multiple sweeps of my work and cut out where possible or rephrase sentences so they are smaller. I have now down this and managed to get down to 5489 words, which is in the 10% leeway. 

Assignment Four

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Here is a link to my fourth assignment:

Assignment Four

I had my feedback tutorial for assignment four today with my tutor. My tutor stated that my voice is starting is show through in my work but there are areas that are lacking. For example, my methodology is not fully evident in the document. It may be a case of clarifying things, adding a few sentences and explaining my reasoning. One part that needs clarifying is where I say that I will be looking at certain things but not others. Whilst word count is a valid reason, I still have the final say of what is included, I need to explain why I made these decisions. My tutor also said in certain parts, I sound unsure and uncertain, especially when I say ‘I think’. To help this, I need to weave sources with ideas to back them up and create a strong base. I need to establish my ideas with sources, by creating a relationship between them. Some of my writing is too ‘wordy’, so I can cut a bit out here. This is a problem as it obscures the topic. 

In my second chapter, I look at the male gaze. My tutor said that my introduction is good, but the rest is fragmented. The main theorist who looks into the male gaze is Laura Mulvey, yet her work is missing from my research. My comparison of Dorothea Lange and Ansel Adams need amending and re-developing. I need to give the history behind them, for example Dorothea Lange worked for the Farm Security Administration which was a government organisation. This bears relevance to my comparison. I need to make clear that one of the images I used for comparison are portraits, not landscape, so I can explain their relevance. I also need to look again at my comparison of Catherine Opie’s work and her aim. Especially when looking at the technically perspectives. 

In my third chapter, I discuss pedagogy, as this topic was quite new to me, there some are some issues. I need to make it clear that pedagogy is all education. I need to look at the term androgogy, and talk about how it is not an accepted term. I can also bring here how pedagogy can be used to help adults amended their thoughts. 

Here is my annotated document:

A4 – Annotated FileDownload

Here is my feedback report that I filled in with my tutors additional comments:

Feedback ReportDownload

Responding to the Feedback

My feedback session raised a few points where I need to work on and are lacking. I need to explain my reasoning. For example I need to say why I have included what I  have but excluded something else. I realised I haven’t done this and will work on it for my final draft. 

I need to use my sources and weave their arguments and explain how they relate to my own arguments. 

I also need to bring in the work of the main theorists like Laura Mulvey. My research does look at her work but I need to properly integrate her theories into my work as it will be valuable for my work. 

I will take this feedback on board and try to remedy it.  

Assignment Four – First Draft

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Brief

Submit the draft manuscript for your extended written project, observing the following submission guidelines:

  • 5,000 words in length (+/- 10% maximum). This excluded quotations, footnotes, bibliography and direct quotations.
  • Your extended written project must be typed using Microsoft Word or similar word processing software. Don’t use design software such as Adobe InDesign. It should be A4, portrait orientation, set at 12pt in a plain typeface, at 1.5 line spacing.
  • Your extended written project must be fully illustrate and referenced and have a complete list of references and separate bibliography. Include a contents page and list of illustrations, and appendices where necessary.
  • Incluse a cover page, with your name and student number, course title, the titles of your extended written project and work counts, including and excluding footnotes and quotations. Consider the title of your extended written project carefully. It should be succinct (one line maximum) and hint at the subject of your extended written project. Your title should entice the reader, but don’t be frivolous and undermine the overall academic tone.
  • Use ‘auto text’ to insert page numbers (starting from the Introduction). This is not only good practice but will allow your tutor and the assessors to refer to specific points in their feedback.
  • Submit your work as either a Word document or PDF, or hard copy. Liaise with your tutor for their preferred format.

Assignment Four

Here is my fourth assignment which is the first draft of my 5000 word essay:

Assignment Four – First DraftDownload

Word Count

The limit for this essay is 5000 words +/- 10%. Before I submitted my first draft, I have 6594 words excluding quotes etc. It was quite a lot over. But I did have leeway and scope to cut it down. I contacted my tutor to ask whether I should cut the word count down before submitting or in light of feedback. She advised to make multiple sweeps of my work and cut out where possible or rephrase sentences so they are smaller. I have now down this and managed to get down to 5489 words, which is in the 10% leeway.

Assignment Notes

After feedback from my tutor on my introduction and my first chapter (assignment three), I revisited them to work on the advice.

My introduction is tailored to introduce the topic and provide a very brief account of what I intend to do. 

My first chapter has been amended and looks at the reasoning behind how the inequality spread in the art world and into landscape photography. 

In my second chapter, I look at the male gaze and how I think it has influenced society and our perception of landscape photography. I believe the male gaze plays a part in our perception of the landscape. We are use to seeing images by male photographers, we are effectively seeing the world through a male perspective. I looked at how some female artists are addressing the male gaze, they are contrasting their work against Ansel Adams’ landscapes to highlight their female gaze. I believe this is an important part to look into as it looks at how we see landscape images, the hidden sub-conscious narrative within them and how female artists are using their work to highlight a gendered gaze. 

In my third chapter, I put forward an idea that could be implemented to help fight the inequality effectively. I looked at how galleries can help the immediate problem. I then look into pedagogy and how this could effectively be used to teach the next generation and stop inequality across the board. I believe pedagogy would be a tremendous step in helping gender inequality not just in landscape photography, but it would help the inequality in everyday life. It would be beneficial for the generations to come. 

In my conclusion, I bring everything together and bring my work to a close.  

I have set-out my document with a cover page, which includes my name, student number, title, and word counts with and without quotations. Next I have my contents page, then the introduction, chapter one, chapter two, chapter three, conclusion, references list, figures list and then the bibliography. 

My research has aided in my assignment and has formed the bulk of my research folder. My research has taken many forms, from books and journals, to websites and information pamphlets. 

Here is a link to my research folder page, which includes a full bibliography:

Research Folder

Tutor Feedback

Here is a link to my tutor’s feedback for this assignment and also my comments and how I am responding to the feedback:

Tutor Feedback